Are Boutonnieres Out of Style for Weddings?

Weddings are a melting pot of traditions and trends, where the old is often blended with the new to create a celebration that is both timeless and contemporary. The question we're examining today is: Are boutonnieres out of style for weddings, or do they still hold a place in the modern groom’s wardrobe?


The Boutonniere: A Timeless Tradition or a Fading Fashion?

Weddings are a melting pot of traditions and trends, where the old is often blended with the new to create a celebration that is both timeless and contemporary. One of the enduring symbols of groom attire is the boutonniere—a floral decoration worn on the lapel of the groom’s suit. But as with all things in fashion, its popularity ebbs and flows with the tides of time. The question we’re examining today is: Are boutonnieres out of style for weddings, or do they still hold a place in the modern groom’s wardrobe?

The boutonniere, or buttonhole, as it’s known in some parts of the world, has its roots in chivalric times when a knight would wear his lady’s colors as a statement of his affection. Through the centuries, this evolved into a more refined practice, where a single bloom or small floral arrangement would be worn to signify love, special occasions, and significant events. In the context of weddings, the boutonniere has come to symbolize the groom’s bond to the bride, often echoing the flowers in her bouquet, and serving as a mark of his distinguished role in the ceremony.

Yet, as we move through the 21st century, wedding fashion is seeing a transformation. The emphasis on personal style and individual expression has never been stronger. The modern groom has a plethora of choices that go beyond the traditional black tuxedo and into a realm of personalization that could potentially leave the boutonniere behind. But is this the case? Let’s delve into the world of wedding attire, the boutonniere’s place in it, and its relevance in today’s nuptial celebrations.


1. The Evolution of Wedding Attire

Wedding Attire Through the Ages

To understand the current standing of the boutonniere, we must first glance back at the evolution of wedding attire. Originally, wedding attire was less about fashion and more about showcasing one’s social standing, with brides and grooms wearing their finest clothes to represent their families. As society progressed, so did the expectations of wedding attire, with specific trends and styles coming into vogue.

The Boutonniere in Fashion’s Timeline

The boutonniere has had its periods of high fashion, particularly in the 19th and early 20th centuries when no gentleman would be seen without one at any formal occasion. In wedding attire, the boutonniere became a staple, a focal point of the groom’s ensemble, complementing not only his attire but also the overall wedding theme.

The Role of Tradition Today

While fashion constantly changes, weddings often hold onto certain traditions. Many couples find value in the historical significance and the sentimental value of including elements like the boutonniere in their ceremony. These small nods to the past provide a sense of continuity and connection to generations before.

2. The Significance of Boutonnieres

Symbolism and Significance

The boutonniere, with a small floral accent, carries with it a profound symbolism in the context of a wedding. Traditionally pinned to the groom’s lapel, it serves as a visual connector between the couple, often matching the bride’s bouquet or the wedding theme, and reinforces the unity they are about to embrace.

Historical Roots: Tracing back to European nobility, where displaying fresh flowers was a sign of status, the boutonniere has evolved from a medieval knight bearing his lady’s colors to a groom showcasing a flower from the bride’s selection. This evolution marks the boutonniere as a token of love and fealty.

Love and Unity: Modern weddings continue to honor this tradition, selecting flowers that bear meaning. Roses, for instance, echo love and passion, while other blooms might signify new beginnings or fidelity. This small accessory transcends its decorative purpose, becoming a symbol of the couple’s commitment and shared future.

Cultural Variations

Western Cultures: In North America and much of Europe, the boutonniere is a standard component of the groom’s attire. It’s often a single bloom or a small cluster of flowers and is worn on the left lapel over the heart, symbolizing the groom’s love for his partner.

Asian Weddings: In some Asian cultures, the boutonniere is not a standard tradition. However, as Western-style weddings become more popular in countries like Japan and South Korea, the adoption of the boutonniere has become more prevalent, albeit with regional floral choices that may carry specific meanings within those cultures.

Indian Weddings: In Indian weddings, while the boutonniere itself may not be a traditional accessory, there is a strong tradition of adorning the groom with flowers. Garlands or elaborate floral accessories are common, and they represent the same concepts of beauty, vitality, and connection to nature.

Latin American Weddings: Latin American grooms may also wear boutonnieres, though the style and flower choice often reflect the vibrant colors and symbolism significant to their culture. For example, a bright flower like a dahlia or a marigold might be chosen for its connection to indigenous traditions and meanings.

Middle Eastern and African Cultures: In Middle Eastern and African weddings, the use of flowers can be quite different. Some cultures may include herbal and fragrant additions to the groom’s attire, symbolizing fertility or protection. While not always worn as a boutonniere, these elements serve a similar purpose in celebrating the union.

European Variations: In Mediterranean countries, flowers are a central part of wedding celebrations, often symbolizing new life and fertility. A Greek groom, for example, may have a boutonniere that includes herbs like basil alongside flowers, while in Italy, the choice of flower in the boutonniere might have superstitious significance, intended to ward off evil spirits.

3. Modern Groom Fashion

The Contemporary Groom

Today’s groom is not confined to the traditional standards of wedding fashion. The modern man’s wardrobe is diverse, with a range of styles, colors, and accessories to choose from. This shift in men’s fashion has affected how the boutonniere is viewed.

Influence of Pop Culture

Celebrity weddings and pop culture play a significant role in shaping wedding trends. Grooms are now looking to high-fashion runways and style icons when planning their wedding attire, which may or may not include a boutonniere.

4. Alternative to Boutonnieres

Accessorizing Without Boutonnieres

Pocket Squares: The pocket square is a classic alternative to the boutonniere. It offers a splash of color and sophistication to the groom’s outfit. The fabric can match the theme of the wedding or have a contrasting pattern to add a touch of whimsy or elegance, depending on the desired effect.

Lapel Pins: Lapel pins are emerging as a popular alternative to the traditional flower boutonniere. These can range from elegant metal designs, symbolic motifs, or even customized pins that reflect the couple’s interests or heritage.

Brooches: A brooch can serve as a timeless and elegant accessory. Vintage brooches can add a touch of history and sentimentality, while modern designs can align with a contemporary wedding style.

Tie Bars and Clips: For a subtle touch of style, tie bars and clips can be both functional and decorative. They come in various metals and designs, and can even be engraved with initials or the wedding date.

Cufflinks: Cufflinks are a small detail that can make a big impact. They offer another opportunity to incorporate wedding colors, personal symbols, or family heirlooms into the groom’s attire.

Foliage and Herbs: For a more naturalistic approach, some grooms opt for greenery in place of florals. Sprigs of rosemary, olive branches, or eucalyptus can be used to create a more understated look while still connecting with nature.

Cultural Ornaments: Drawing on cultural practices, grooms might choose accessories that reflect their heritage, such as a Scottish tartan, a Maori bone carving, or a Native American silver piece.

Statement Watches: A distinctive watch can be both a fashion statement and a memento. It’s a functional accessory that can be selected to match the wedding’s aesthetic or can be a family heirloom passed down through generations.

Suspenders and Braces: For a vintage or rustic wedding, suspenders or braces can replace the boutonniere as a focal point of the groom’s attire. They can be color-coordinated with the wedding theme and add a charming, old-school vibe.

No Accessories: In some cases, grooms may choose the minimalist approach and forego accessories altogether, letting the cut and fit of their attire take center stage. This clean, modern look is becoming increasingly popular.

Pros and Cons


  1. Symbolic Elegance: Boutonnieres offer a classic touch and are rich in matrimonial symbolism.
  2. Visual Connection: They create a cohesive look between the couple and the wedding party.
  3. Customization: Flowers and designs can be personalized to the couple’s taste.


  1. Additional Cost: They can be an extra expense, particularly if exotic or out-of-season flowers are chosen.
  2. Fragility: Fresh flowers may not withstand a full day of festivities.
  3. Complexity: Boutonnieres require careful pinning, which can be a delicate process.

5. Personalizing Wedding Attire

Expression of Individual Style

Boutonnieres as Personal Statements: A boutonniere can be much more than a traditional floral pin. For those with a flair for the unique, it can be customized to reflect personal tastes, hobbies, or even a profession. For instance, an artist might incorporate a tiny paintbrush or a palette into the design, or a book lover might have a miniature book as part of his boutonniere. This level of personalization ensures that the boutonniere is not just an accessory but a statement of individuality.

Color and Texture: The groom has the opportunity to play with color and texture within his boutonniere. He can choose a bloom that contrasts strikingly with his suit or opt for textural elements like berries, small succulents, or feathers to stand out and add a personal touch.

Seasonal and Locality Flair: The choice of a boutonniere can also reflect the season or the location of the wedding. A fall wedding might inspire the use of deep reds and oranges with accents of wheat or berries, while a beach wedding could prompt the inclusion of seashells or starfish.

Importance of Individuality

Individuality Reflects the Couple’s Unique Story: Every couple has a distinctive narrative, and a wedding is a celebration of that story. The choice of a boutonniere or its alternative isn’t just about the visual appeal; it’s a chapter in their storybook. A unique boutonniere that represents a shared interest or memory between the couple can be a subtle nod to their journey.

It’s a Statement of Personality: Grooms today are more involved in the wedding planning process and are keen on expressing their style. A boutonniere that breaks away from the norm, or the selection of a non-traditional accessory, allows the groom to infuse his personality into his attire. It’s an opportunity to stand out and feel confident in the role he’s playing on this significant day.

Celebrates Diversity and Inclusivity: Weddings are increasingly becoming celebrations of diversity. The inclusion of cultural elements or symbols that honor the groom’s heritage in the form of a boutonniere or accessory can be a powerful statement of inclusivity and respect for individual backgrounds.

Freedom from Conformity: Choosing a boutonniere that is unconventional or deciding to forgo it altogether for a different accessory can be liberating. It represents a departure from conformity and an embrace of personal taste. In doing so, it sets a precedent that weddings are not one-size-fits-all and should be tailored to fit the individuals involved.

6. The Boutonniere Debate

Arguments for Tradition

Many argue that boutonnieres should remain a staple due to their traditional significance and the elegance they add to the groom’s attire.

Arguments for Change

On the other side of the debate, there’s a growing sentiment that the modern groom’s fashion can stand on its own without the need for traditional accessories like the boutonniere.

7. Making the Choice

Deciding on Boutonnieres

The decision to include boutonnieres in a wedding should take into account the couple’s vision, the formality of the event, and how they want to balance tradition with modernity.

Choosing the Right Style

For those opting for boutonnieres, there’s a world of options beyond the classic rose or carnation. The right style can complement the wedding’s aesthetic and add a personal touch to the groom’s attire.


The Timeless Nature of Wedding Traditions

Traditions like the boutonniere have stood the test of time for a reason. They carry historical significance and add a ceremonial element to the wedding attire.

Making Informed Decisions for Your Style

In deciding whether boutonnieres are out of style, it’s essential to recognize that weddings are deeply personal events. What matters most is that the couple feels their choices reflect who they are and the love they share.

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